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Mental illness is a disease that if not treated will often lead to death.  Children living with a mentally ill parent will in all likelihood take effects of the disease into adulthood.  It may seem that America is an enlightened society, but there is still a lot of education needed before many will look upon those affected with compassion.  Until that happens, the stigma of being mentally ill will continue to hinder treatments to contain, control, and heal.

Not all mental illness lasts a lifetime, and not all mental illness carries the possibility that the person affected may harm others.  People with depression turn within themselves, often getting to the point where they cannot see how anyone else is affected.  At a time when they most need the compassion of friends and family, instead they push others away—or others break away for lack of knowing what to do or what to say.

The Christian church over time has contributed to the stigma and shame of this disease.  Though many denominations now embrace the mentally ill, there are still those that consider it a sin and even deny a Christian ending to life, i.e. a church-sponsored funeral service.  Sermons are still given promoting a “get right with God and you will be healed” attitude that sounds so simple in words, but impossible for those suffering.  Thus, the one place where love is consistently spoken denies that love for those so in need of it.

Children living with a mentally ill parent do not have the capacity to understand what is happening in their homes.  It is difficult for most adults to understand, and even more so for children.  There is helplessness for lack of knowing what to do, or how to fix the problem.  A child’s world is turned upside down—Mom or Dad, who are to be depended upon to nurture and fix their hurts, are visible but not available—and may inappropriately turn to the child putting he or she into the parental roll.

As children grow older and gain understanding, they may still be thinking about the mental illness in terms of how they felt at the age when it first affected them.  Worse still, is if the illness ended in death (suicide) there is then no possibility of a healing time for the relationships gone so awry.

The reasons for mental illness are still illusive to medical researchers.  Yes, often the root causes, such as abuse and neglect can be identified, but that does not explain why some seem to sail over their problems while others stop and lose ground.  Although there have been great advances in treatment and medications, there is still much study needed, as current medications may actually exacerbate the disease.

Ongoing public education is necessary, promoting understanding that it is an illness and needs to be treated.  Until the stigma and shame of needing counseling help or medication are removed, this often fatal disease will go undertreated, or not treated at all, reaping profound effects upon everyone in society.

I see a need for families affected to be able to come together and share feelings about the after-affects of having a mentally ill person in the home.

I see a need for education about how and what to say to those with mental illness.

I see a need for education in schools and churches that says getting help does not have to be a secret, shameful thing to do.

I see a need for businesses to educate executives and staff making managerial judgment decisions that those who have been treated for mental illness in the past are not necessarily marked as unemployable for life.

I see a need to educate the medical community not working in the psychiatric field that mental illness is a disease, that those seeking treatment are not hypochondriacs making up illnesses—that those on psychiatric medications are to be taken seriously.

I see a need for those in public broadcasting when reporting petty and non life-threatening crimes to stop adding an addendum on stating that the person involved “has a history of mental illness.”

I see a need for those brave enough to get help to be congratulated for their efforts.

For churches wishing to do a teaching on mental illness I suggest using a hymn that can be found in the Lutheran Book of Worship and other hymnals as well, number 394, Lost in the Night.  Because I am not sure of copyright issues at this time, I am not adding the text of this hymn here.

A message to those who are suffering….
Now I write from first-hand experience, as one with a close family member who was very ill with depression.  With confidence I tell you that there is hope, and though it may seem that you are alone, you are not.  There is someone in the shadows nearby suffering with you, and that is Jesus Christ–who knows what it is to feel as alone as you do now.   Maybe you are mad at God, but he isn’t mad at you.

You are not bad, you are not shameful, nor are you evil.  What you are is sick.  Please, if you are not receiving help right now and have no one to ask, call a hotline, a church, or walk into a hospital and say you need it.  You don’t have to be a secret—what you need is to get better, for you and your loved ones’ sakes.

I look out at the dark night’s sky
A reflection of my heart tonight
Though weary through my very soul
Wakening thoughts take their toll

Dreams of terror fill my mind
My heart races, consumed with fear
Satan’s daggers pierce me through
His claw-like nails attack me too

Bottles of wine to dull the pain
Last only for moments
No rest I gain
Slowly sliding down to hell.

I want to run away from me
Sleep seems the only choice
My cries for help are never heard
My mind, it has no voice

Consumed by me yet lost inside
The battle for me—how will it end?
How odd that I cannot find me
When I don’t even know who me is

No longer is there a world outside
Bound tight within my lost mind
Day and night cease to exist
It is complete, I have entered the abyss

My cry for help is finally heard
How did he read my mind?
Maybe he’s felt the touch of hell
Can read it in my eyes

Ten years of pain to find myself
The one who’s really me
Yet ever greatful for that one
God’s miracle set me free